What is it about babies that makes us go “coo coo for Cocoa Puffs”? It is said that; interacting with babies can evoke powerful emotional responses due to their innocence, vulnerability, and potential for growth.

Babies often display behaviors such as smiling, cooing, and reaching out for interaction, which can be inherently rewarding for adults. Additionally, caring for and nurturing a baby can fulfill psychological needs for love, connection, and purpose.

When our son Vinny FaceTimes his Mom with our soon to be 8 month old granddaughter, my wife is immediately raptured into a love frenzy.

Her smile is as bright as the sun bellowing out beams of unbridled joy and laughter from her heart, (much like I used to do in those early dating years!) Just kidding. Here is Brenda; “Grandma loves that little girl”! “How are you doing today”? “Are you doing okay”?

This goes on for a strong 3-4 minutes as I somehow manage to steal 30 seconds from our face-time before she has had enough of both of us. She’ll start squirming and becoming discontent as though she suddenly finds the audience of her grandparents boring and nothing can save us! It’s over!

This precious life can summon mirth in an instant. It’s a chance for us to experience love in a moment from a pure source. No animosity, no schemes, no admission charge.

I’ve always felt babies were kind of a litmus test to me. If a baby is passed around the room over time and doing well and playful with others, and then delivered to me and starts crying and screaming uncontrollably, and they have been changed and fed, no upset stomach, their gums aren’t agitated from teething, I might wonder ‘is it me’? Because the winners are the ones who can make the baby smile, laugh, and interact with you.

I realize as an adult, it’s impossible to turn back the clock to that state of innocence, purity, and harmless existence, (it’s a wrap!) But there was a time in my first 6 months of life, I was
bringing joy and garnering admiration from onlookers. You may not remember, but there was a time you too were the talk of the town!

I watch our 16 year old grandson holding his baby sister as we used to hold and cuddle him. Time goes so fast. I remember strapping our grandson Jeremiah in his car seat, bringing in tow, his entourage of playpen, car seats, toys, and diaper bag.

It was about a year ago, when this same baby boy who grew up to be a young man with facial hair and a deepened tenor voice who advised me and grandmother to put on our seatbelts as he was now chauffeuring us! The pure joy in the circle of life.

anablepisis

I always say, ‘there’s nothing like a good laugh!’ I’m sure there is debate somewhere out there as to whether it’s good or not. A sundry of circumstances at just the right time could make us laugh. Whatever triggers your laughter, I’ve come to learn that it just might be good for our health after all.

According to an article in News Medical Life Sciences late last year “There are two different types of laughter found in humans, including involuntary emotionally-driven laughter, which is reliant on a positive emotional state, and voluntary laughter that represents the intentional reproduction of emotional laughter.”  

The article goes on to say; according to Psychologist, Susan Albers, explaining how humor can impact immunity in positive ways, stating, “Laughter helps to boost the immune system, which makes us more resistant to disease. Also, it decreases stress hormones, which are taxing to the immune system. On the other hand, laughter increases the antibody-producing cells and T cells in our bodies. These cells are like a defense army against illness.”

So there you have it, you and I have a medical clearance to laugh to our heart’s content!

Even though so much is happening so quickly in our lives, it’s a good practice to avoid stress at all costs. It can encroach on our peace before we know it. 

Stress quietly enters the defenses through repetitive thinking and meditating on things we tend to worry about. If not harnessed, and managed quickly and effectively, it is allowed to grow to the semblance of living under an emotional and psychological RED alert inside the mind!

Granted, there’s a lot going on in the world, in our homes, relationships, job, education, business that requires sobriety. We must be vigilant.

But every now and then, something happens that may strike the funny bone just right. Don’t pass up the opportunity to laugh. Get it all out… and feel better!

anablepsis.

Time. Ever present but fleeting. The sweeping second hand of a clock. In a second, something gained, something lost. I was awakened this morning to a tragedy of a young man we knew through our neighbor, killed in an auto accident, just a few short hours ago. 

Driving home from getting a late night snack. The video footage showed him approaching the intersection northbound on a green light and was met by someone barreling through the intersection at a high rate of speed torpedoing eastbound into the intersection hitting the side of his car…I believe he never knew what hit him.

Instantly in eternity. Death interrupted him from making it home. Only doing as he had done before on that fateful night.

I hadn’t seen this young man in years but the last time I did, was at a cookout over a holiday, little did I know it would be the last time I would see him alive.

While the story is very sad for the family and friends more closely connected, the haunting reminder is ever present through the haze of grief …. time.

A curious thing about time, not always viewed for the precious commodity it is. My daughter Erika, who we lost over two years ago, was given 12,541 days on this earth. She didn’t know it, I didn’t know it. 

Like a silent person on a journey, time moves through the earth, punching eternal time clocks in and out of life. 

cycles….seasons…. moments. The sands are always silently streaming through the hourglass.

A wise king once said concerning time in his record found  in Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

1 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:

2 a time to be born and a time to die,
    a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
    a time to tear down and a time to build,

4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
    a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
    a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
6 a time to search and a time to give up,
    a time to keep and a time to throw away,

7 a time to tear and a time to mend

a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8 a time to love and a time to hate,
    a time for war and a time for peace.

No matter where we are in the span of time, these words ring true. 

Someone weeping this morning over loss of life, while others are rejoicing over brand new life that science and the medical community said could never be..a miracle!

Someone is up early this morning grappling over a problem searching desperately for a solution. Another just received an answer to prayer. 

Someone is facing court today worrying about an outcome they may or may not face, while a couple is getting prepared to catch a flight, headed on a trip of a lifetime. Someone is battling to stay alive another day in hospice, while another is getting dressed for the first day of their new job.

All of these activities are happening under the same sky, in the context of time. 

How will we fill this day with the time given? What positive memories will we create? What can we say to someone who needs to hear an encouraging word?

How will you and I use this year, month, day, hour minute and second for good? 

We can, if we will.

anablepsis. 

Welcome to 2024! Is it me or did the past 12 months seem to fly by? 

As 2024 is now a reality, have you asked yourself (before now) ‘how will I show up in 2024, what will be different this year than in prior ones’?

Here’s a burning question for the ages; Have you discovered your life’s purpose? 

It may or may not be found in what you do or have done for a living. My guess, is that you’ve been living it out for years without knowing it. You may not see it as a purposeful assignment; perhaps you’ve brushed it aside. 

Have you noticed how and where you positively affect things around you? I believe it’s there, maybe not as visible because you do it fluidly without thinking and could relegate it as just part of your human makeup or personality.

Some have discovered their purpose in life but have yet to put it to use. Well, I’m standing here in 2024 to remind you it’s not too late. 

Look for clues: 

What things are improved after your input?
Do you find yourself effortlessly solving problems?
Do you have a knack for being creative? Making something from nothing, or causing something to be more serviceable than before?
Do you communicate in a way where you are heard and understood clearly and others are motivated by what they hear coming from you?
Do you have compassion for the less fortunate and disadvantaged?  

Let me encourage you to take note of things you do excellently with little or no effort, these may be tools for your assignment in the purpose of your life.

If you’re reading this post, there is still time to discover your purpose. Once you identify and acknowledge it, you can begin putting it to good use, regardless of how much time you have left.  

Grant it, some of us need to get on with it more than others because the clock is ticking and we don’t have as many New Year’s left than others, however we have now and we have today. Don’t let what you’ve done already, your age, your status in life whether good or bad define what could be ahead.

I pray you discover your assignment this year. I pray you improve on your assignment this year. I pray you bring a better and more complete YOU to the assignment.

Happy New Year, and Happy New YOU!

Kelvin 

Photo Credit: Brenda Chambliss

As we approach the day known to most of the world as Christmas, I’ll share some thoughts.

Originally, Christmas was designed to commemorate the birth of Jesus Christ.

Over the years the focus gradually shifted from the announcement of glad tidings of Jesus’ birth through Christmas carols, gilded houses bearing the nativity scene of baby Jesus with parents Joseph, Mary and wise men in tow to Santa, reindeers and Frosty the Snowman!

 Isn’t it interesting how over time we segue from the original intent of Christmas to sales and marketing and never knew when it actually happened?… I digress.

 The purpose of this post is concerning thoughts I have of those who get lost during the holidays and suffer from what was coined as “Holiday Blues.” 

I thought suicide spiked around this time of year until I came across an article from last year’s December edition of U.S. News; that found in Research from the Annenberg Public Policy Center of the University of Pennsylvania, that this was a myth. In a poll it was discovered that 56% (including me) believed this was true, while 44% debunked the idea.

 While I’m thrilled to know that the idea of people not cutting their lives short during the holidays isn’t at an all time high based on research and reporting, I still believe there is no better time to remember and appreciate those we care about and love and to be thoughtful to remind them that they are not forgotten all year round.

 Holidays mean different things to various people. This past Thanksgiving, while gathered around an intimate table with my wife Brenda, Dad, Mom and siblings, my mind drifted from the blessing before me to those alone inside a circumstance no making of their own. Death, desertion, divorce can change the landscape of one’s life in just one day. Young people and children who aimlessly meander through times of festive celebration and finding themselves strangers to what’s going on around them because they have no place to call home or family.

Many face challenges daily with no ‘break in the action’ as their responsibilities anchor them to circumstances that give them NO holiday or respite.

 Don’t get me wrong, in every station of life we may find ourselves, there is always something to be grateful for, YES even in the worst cases of life. For God’s merciful eye to locate us in sorrow, loss, grief or pain is a blessing.

 So here is my challenge to us; from now until December 25th and indeed through the rest of this year, let’s take time and think of others and make ourselves the blessing we would like to see. An unanticipated phone call could do it, a house visit, a card, an opportunity to meet a need and show good will.

Isaiah 9:6 says; Unto us a child was born, unto us a Son is given…

Yes, He was a baby in a manger, but grew up to become Savior and King, so let’s continue His wonderful legacy first by ensuring He is OUR Savior and dedication our lives to serving as citizens of His Kingdom.

 Warmest and Best Wishes year round.

The thing that pulled me out from where I was, is the news of a great friend of mine gone missing and it has been a long time now. He called Brenda on her birthday and that was it. Never heard from him since.

I’m writing this to try and capture feelings and emotions in this space. It’s numbing, its grief, it’s sadness, open ended.

My friend lived in Chicago, I met him at the church my father Pastored several years ago, he attended regularly and we connected from there.

He helped me work out with weights and the machine, I loss a teenager (in weight!) and got fit. Yep, “a lean mean fighting machine”, I didn’t fight though, just trained.

My friend taught me about running and finishing strong. I learned how in running to increase in distance incrementally and run through the finish in the end, don’t just stop.

We had different upbringings, different history, but one thing in common, we loved the Lord. We stood together through much pain and grief over the years, each bearing our soul to each other. I will always remember those times. They built us, they grew us up and matured us.

It’s strange without a formal goodbye. It’s weird because  even while not talking for brief periods of time, there was nothing final to it, it was like putting a book mark in a book and picking up where you left off next time. This feels different.

The longer the days go by, the more it seems unlikely to see him again.

This is just another sobering reminder to be conscious of the time spent, and time shared. Had I known that last conversation would find me here, I would’ve said something much different before hanging up.

Truth is, we never know…So, now I’m making adjustments that leave my last talk, my last acknowledgment, more meaningful, more lasting because we never know it may be the last.

anablepsis.

On days when you’re low, feeling down, despondent or even anxious, did you know that 80% of things we worry about never happens?

Life is a cavalcade of episodes and experiences that come to teach us, build us, and to give us knowledge, into becoming mature and established humans.

Hard times usually accomplishes this, disappointment usually achieves it, but the benefits from them aren’t seen initially but over time. How we see circumstances is one thing, what we understand about them and the benefits as a result is another. Some of our ways and practices reach their end, to transition us into a more preferable and fruitful way of being. This change may come voluntarily or involuntarily but it rescues us from the part of ourselves we’re blinded to that may cause harm to ourselves or others and threaten our future.

The detours, change of direction don’t abort the goal but often times ensures it, protects it. This change of direction neither diminishes our value or worth as a person but reveals it over time. To me humility is preferred  more than humiliation, the first is my choice, the second is a result of NOT choosing to do the first.

Let wisdom through the challenges of our time teach us and lead us into a more balanced and improved version of who God has called and designed us to be.

Let God complete the work in progress presently in your life and the positive results He wants to bring to fruition .

anablepsis

Photo Credit: Brenda Chambliss

Hey everybody I needed some time away from writing. But I’m back and will seek to post every three days or so again.

Dear George,

I know you don’t know me but I’m Kelvin, a guy still living in the world you occupied for 46yrs of your abbreviated life.

Just wanted you to know how interestingly different things have been here in America since you’ve been gone just 12 days ago.

Many more people know your name than before and are saying it as though they knew you personally. You would be amazed. Your name is being memorialized even in other cities in America.

Yep, your name has even gone beyond the borders of America, would you have imagined that?

Your daughter was even quoted as saying; ‘Daddy changed the world.’

When you got up that Monday morning May 25th 2020, I’m sure you didn’t realize it would be your last day of life, there would have been no reason for you to believe that.

Like too many of your African American unarmed deceased predecessors, dying in the hands of people without the power to give life, you came across one such person dressed in a Minneapolis Minnesota police officer’s uniform that felt you seeing your 47th Birthday was totally out of the question.

George, what could you have done so bad? What could you have said so harmful, that in the company of witnesses and phone video, angering this former police officer to place his knee on your neck and apply pressure on it while you pleaded for your life?

What could you have done so bad that onlookers who pleaded for the officer to stop, went unheeded? What did you do to garner so much anger against you that when you said; ‘I can’t breathe’, your plea went ignored?

You called out for your deceased mother, did you see her in your final moments coming to get you?

George, you were robbed as a citizen of your due process in court here, the person that took your life, felt he would be judge, jury and god over your fate in that moment. It was so easy for him to take your life.

What sin did you commit so worthy of any plea to release you from the grip of death imposed on you to be ignored?

Your cheek to the concrete blood coming from your nose the horror of being unable to breathe, unable to move, what did you do so violently that your end was met with such violence?

It was a horror to watch (and in retrospect) may have been a sin, but must have certainly been unimaginable to experience.

Did you know that you’ve grown famous in your absence here? Your name has been spoken by the president, news personalities and folks who took exception to what happened to you.

All colors, all, nationalities are galvanized together in your memory, in fact, you replaced COVID-19 with opening news for several days.

But look at what it cost…it cost your life. It seemed more easy to take your life than to protect your right as a citizen. “Miranda rights.”

The store owner regrets their employee calling the police on you now, after seeing their handling of you. The store has changed their policy because of what happened to you, imagine that, but it cost you to change it. It cost your family too.

You’re not here to see what your murder did to the country. Your death breached the conciseness of what many who saw with their eyes, and decided in their heart that this must end, and my action must be apart of bringing it about.

Your death brought people out of their homes into the street to peacefully protest, some people were overcome with emotion and in their protesting fought against police this wasn’t wise, others wrongfully took the platform to loot and steal from stores set police cars on fire, this was uncalled for and NOT in the spirit you would have stood for. I believe that.

Yes, George Floyd you have a Wikipedia about you, your picture and all the information about the events that led to your demise. Your public permanent obituary, what happened to you has now become a part of American history.

But it cost. It cost your daughter who will not have her father around to guide, and love her, I think about the times as she grows up that she will really need you.

I pray your brother and other family members will see after your baby girl now, and this will hopefully inspire other men to be present fathers and fatherly examples to those in need.

So George Floyd, for people who want to criticize you personally, this isn’t about you being perfect and any personal problems you may have had, many of us have problems also and many still have them.Your critics have them, your supporters have have them as well. We’re human.

But for now a nation has been gripped by your murder in cold blood under the knee of a man in uniform going beyond his job requirement to make it personal, to make a point for all to see.

You’re gone, but not without an echo of your name, memory and life still ringing throughout this country.

It saddens me that your fame only came about as a result of your loss, the loss of your life.

I pray that the memory of your death will not dissipate over time the protesting certainly will but I trust that the spirit of the protest wont.

This issue of police brutality against African Americans is too serial for comfort, too common, too caviler until your death.

It shouldn’t have been that easy to lose you George. I would rather you still be here and not have known your name, than an “absent celebrity”, reminding us of how far we’ve come, but yet how far we have to go in this country.

Sincerely,

Kelvin

anablepsis