A Letter About Love, Time, and the Moments We Still Have

Dear Mom september 1 2026 happy birthday

Today, you are 87 years old.

87 years of living. 87 years of memories. 87 years of seeing the world change, watching children grow, welcoming grandchildren, great grandchildren, and even great, great, grandchildren. 

Weathering difficult seasons, laughter, praying, giving, sacrificing, all the while becoming the woman we simply call, Mama.

And today, I just want to say: Happy Birthday.

Not casually. Not simply because the calendar says this is the day we are supposed to say it.

For most of our lives, you’ve just been there. There to call. There to ask. There to visit.

There to tell us something we’ve probably hadn’t heard before.

There to remember things we’ve forgotten. Trying to talk you out of worry.

Here to still see her grown children as her children, no matter how old we become.

And perhaps that’s one of the gifts of getting older ourselves, we begin to recognize the value of things that once seemed as though they would always be there.

Our Family Has Learned Something About Time

For 65 years, you and Dad shared a life together.

Sixty-five years.

That’s so much more than a number.

It’s morning conversations and evening routines. Children and family decisions. Church, celebrations, disagreements, personal jokes and family stories. 

Holidays and ordinary Tuesdays. It’s building a life together and growing older side by side.

Two years ago, that life changed in a way none of us fully understood the magnitude of.

I know these past two years have required a different kind of strength from you, Mama. There are parts of that journey only you can truly understand.

But through it all, something beautiful remains.

Sixty-five years together just doesn’t simply disappear, they’re woven into our family.

They’re in the stories we tell, the memories that still make us laugh, the traditions we carry forward, and in all of us who had the privilege of calling him Dad.

And here you are.

Still loving.

Still laughing.

Still Mama.

At 87, you’re proving that even when life changes, there is still life to be lived, people to love, laughter to share, and new memories waiting to be made.

I Want to Say It Now…

There’s something I’ve come to understand as I’ve gotten older.

We shouldn’t save our finest words about people for someday, we need to say them now.

Tell the stories now.

Say thank you now.

Laugh together now.

Tell people what they mean to us while we’re sitting across the table from them.

So, Mom, I want you to know:

You matter.

Your life matters.

Your sacrifices mattered.

The meals mattered.

The prayers mattered.

The worrying mattered, even though we couldn’t stop you from worrying.

The things you taught us as children mattered.

Even some of the things we didn’t appreciate when we were younger make considerably more sense now!

And the older we become, the more we discover pieces of our parents living inside of us.

A phrase.

A habit.

A value.

A recipe.

A way of handling trouble.

That’s a part of family, I guess.

With you at 87, I Don’t Want More Things. I’d Prefer More Moments

None of us knows how many days we are given, this isn’t  something to be sad about.

Maybe it’s something to become more aware of.

Because this birthday isn’t about counting time.

It’s about appreciating it.

I want more conversations.

More laughter.

More sitting around doing absolutely nothing important.

More asking questions about your life.

More hearing the stories.

More pictures.

More meals.

More “remember when?”

More “I love you.”

More hugs that aren’t rushed.

More moments when nobody is staring at a phone.

More opportunities to simply be together.

Because I’m learning that some of life’s greatest moments don’t announce themselves as great moments.

They just look ordinary while they’re happening.

A cup of coffee.

A familiar story.

Hearing someone laughing in the kitchen.

A family sitting around a table.

A phone call you almost didn’t make.

And somewhere along the way, you realize:

That was the good stuff.

And for Those Reading This Who Carry Their Parents in Their Hearts

I also know that a letter like this may land differently for different people.

Some are fortunate enough to celebrate a parent today.

Others carry Mom or Dad in memory.

So perhaps this birthday letter can be about both.

If your parents are still here, enjoy them when and however you can.

And if they aren’t, honor what remains.

Say their names.

Tell their stories.

Cook something they used to make.

Play their favorite song.

Repeat the funny sayings your family will never forget.

Pass one of their lessons along to your children or grandchildren.

Look at an old photograph and smile at the fact that your lives were connected.

Because a parent’s influence has a remarkable way of continuing.

It appears in our values.

Our traditions.

Our sense of humor.

The way we raise our children.

The things we say without realizing where we first heard them.

Love leaves fingerprints.

And some of them never fade.

For Those Whose Parents Are Still Here

Call them.

Visit when you can.

Ask another question.

Take the picture.

Listen to the story again.

Don’t make every interaction about solving a problem.

Sometimes… just sit together.

We spend so much of our lives chasing important things only to discover that some of the most important things were sitting across the table from us.

Scripture says:

“So teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” Psalm 90:12 

I’ve always loved the wisdom in that.

Numbering our days doesn’t have to mean worrying about how many remain.

Maybe it simply means becoming wise enough to appreciate this one.

Today is here.

Mom is here.

We are here.

And that’s worth celebrating.

So, Ma,…

On your 87th birthday, I don’t want to make this complicated.

I just want to give you your flowers while you can smell them.

I want you to hear the applause while you’re here to enjoy it.

I want you to know that your life hasn’t merely filled 87 years on a calendar.

Your life has filled our lives.

And after 87 years, after raising a family, after sharing 65 remarkable years with Dad, after seeing generations come behind you, you are still writing your story.

So we’re not counting chapters today.

We’re celebrating this one.

There are conversations still to have.

Laughter still to share.

Memories still to make.

Stories still to tell.

Love still to give.

And today, if there is cake to eat it, you’ve earned the right to enjoy it without any discussions about calories!

Happy 87th Birthday, Mom.

Thank you for yesterday.

Thank you for today.

And for every tomorrow God graciously gives us, may we have the wisdom not merely to have it….but to notice it.

To be present in it.

To laugh in it.

To love one another through it.

And to never become so busy looking for life’s big moments that we miss the beautiful little ones happening right in front of us.

We love you, Mama.

And today, we’re simply grateful that we get to say it and you can hear it.

Happy Birthday Ma,

With all my love,

Your Son, Kelvin

anablepsis

There was a time when the front porch was more than just part of a house, it was part of a life. It was where the day slowed down. Where rocking chairs creaked in rhythm with conversation. Where neighbors didn’t need an invitation to speak, they simply passed by and belonged.

The front porch was not just architecture. It was culture.

You could sit outside in the evening and watch the neighborhood breathe. Children playing in the yard. Someone walking their dog. A familiar face passing by who would stop, not because they had time, but because connection mattered. Conversations weren’t scheduled. They happened naturally. A wave turned into a greeting, a greeting into a story, and a story into a relationship.

But somewhere along the way, the porch disappeared.

Not always physically but functionally.

In its place, something else took over: the garage.

Now, life often begins and ends behind a closing door. We pull into the driveway, press a button, and disappear into the house without ever touching the outside world. No eye contact. No passing conversations. No shared space between “mine” and “yours.”

And with that shift, something deeper began to fade, the sense of neighborliness.

From openness to fear….. Part of this change is rooted in fear.

We hear more about danger now than ever before. News cycles thrive on highlighting the worst of humanity. Over time, this reshapes how we see people, not as neighbors, but as potential threats. The stranger walking down the street is no longer someone to greet, but someone to watch.

Front porches require openness. And openness feels risky in a world that constantly reminds us what could go wrong. So we retreat.

Then came the rise of privacy as a priority.

Privacy is not inherently wrong, it can be healthy. But when it becomes a governing value, it builds invisible walls. Fences get taller. Windows stay closed. Lives become more contained.

We’ve traded shared spaces for controlled environments.

Where the front porch invited interruption, modern living often avoids it. Where conversation once flowed freely, now it must be arranged, scheduled, or texted in advance.

We’ve become more connected digitally, yet more distant physically.

New generations are growing up in a different rhythm altogether.

Many have never experienced what it’s like to sit on a porch and simply be available. Social interaction has largely moved online. Community is often found in interest groups rather than geography. You can know someone across the world better than the person living next door.

It’s not that people don’t value connection, it’s that the form of connection has changed, something gets lost when proximity no longer produces relationships.

We were never meant to live anonymously among people we see every day.

The loss of the front porch has come at a quiet cost.

We’ve lost casual accountability, the kind that comes from being known. We’ve lost spontaneous encouragement, the kind that comes from a neighbor who notices when you’re not yourself. We’ve lost the simple “ministry of presence”.

Loneliness has increased, even in crowded neighborhoods.

People are closer than ever in distance, but farther apart in heart.

The porch itself isn’t the solution, it’s what it represents.

We don’t need a literal porch to be present. But we do need intentionality.

It might look like sitting outside instead of staying in. Making eye contact instead of avoiding it. Saying “hello” first. Slowing down long enough to notice who is around you. It might feel small, even insignificant.

But that’s how it always started.

A porch wasn’t built for grand gestures, it was built for ordinary faithfulness to human connection. And maybe that’s what we need again. Not a return to the past, but a reclaiming of what made it meaningful. Because at the heart of it all, the question isn’t really about porches. It’s about people, and whether we are still willing to make room for one another.

anablepisis

There’s something powerful about a new beginning.

At the start of the year, many of us stood at the threshold of change with determination in our hearts. We committed to eating better, moving more, thinking clearer, and living stronger, aligning mind, body, and spirit. Some resolved to build something meaningful, a business, a ministry, a legacy. Others simply made a quiet but profound decision: “I want to be better than I’ve been.”

And yet, somewhere along the short journey of these few months, reality set in.

Plans don’t always unfold as we’d imagined. Motivation fades. Old habits resurface. Life interrupts with its unexpected weight. And now, for some, the temptation is whispering: “Maybe this just isn’t for me.”

But hear this clearly: I’d argue, we may be closer than we think.

Struggle is not a sign of failure, it’s evidence of movement. Anything worth building will resist us before it rewards us. Growth doesn’t come wrapped in comfort; (uh, uh) it comes dressed in challenge, persistence, and often disappointment.

There is a phrase that says, “Hope deferred makes the heart sick,” but we often forget the rest of the truth: when that hope finally arrives, it is no less sweet. Delay does not cancel destiny. Time does not erase purpose.

So maybe our journey hasn’t gone as planned. That doesn’t mean it can’t still be completed.

Sometimes progress requires more than just determination, it may require tweaking or a small adjustment. What if the strategy needs to change. Perhaps the pace needs to shift, maybe the approach should be something never tried before.

What’s wrong with learning a new way forward? In fact, wisdom is often found in the willingness to say, “What I’ve done hasn’t worked, so I’m willing to try something different.” Too often, we talk ourselves out of continuing: “I’m too old,” “I’ve failed too many times,” “If I had more help, “If I had more money,” “If I had the right support system.” “I don’t have the drive anymore.”

But what if those very obstacles are actually shaping us for what we’ve been asking for?

What if our failures were training? What if our delays were preparation?
What if the struggle is producing something in us that success alone never could?

The truth is, the world is meant to benefit from what we are becoming, not just what we achieve. And every time we consider giving up, we are not just walking away from a goal, we are withholding something the world needs from us.

We can’t allow convenience to rob us of our calling.

It is easy to quit. It is easy to settle. It is easy to accept “almost.”

But we weren’t designed for “easy”, but built for purpose.

This is not the time to give up.This is the time to stand firm when it would be easy to walk away. This is the time to press forward when nothing feels like it’s working.
This is the time to believe again, even if it’s quieter, even if it’s slower, even if it looks different.

Strength is not the absence of struggle.Strength is the decision to continue in spite of it.

So let’s take a breath. Refocus. Adjust where needed. Let’s take the next step, no matter how small. Because what we’ve started still matters. What we’ve hoped for is still possible. And who we are becoming…. is still worth fighting for. Don’t quit now!

anablepsis

There is a quiet assumption many people carry through life, may I dare say, even an unspoken belief that their current position, resources, relationships, or status will always be enough. Oh yes, it’s subtle, often unintentional, but deeply rooted in: “I will never be in a place where I would ever need that person.”

But life has a way of humbling and dismantling, certainty.

Circumstances shift. Seasons change. Doors close that once stood wide open. And in those unexpected moments, we often find ourselves standing at a place we never imagined….needing help from the very kinds of people we once overlooked, dismissed, or prejudged.

This is not just about position. It’s about perception.

Every day, we cross paths with individuals whose roles, backgrounds, or appearances might seem insignificant to us. It may be the quiet worker behind the scenes, the person in a different economic bracket, someone from a different culture, or simply someone whose life path doesn’t mirror our own.

Because we may not need them at the moment, we may fail to truly see them.

We may not intend harm, but indifference can wound just as deeply as disrespect. Dismissiveness can quietly communicate, “You don’t matter in my world.”

But, in reality, “our world” may be much smaller than we think.

History and everyday life both testify to this reality: the roles people play in our lives are not fixed. The person you ignore today may be the one with the key tomorrow.
The one you speak down to today may be the voice you desperately need to hear later.
The one you assume is beneath you may one day, may stand in a position to lift you or leave you where you are. Life doesn’t move in straight lines. It turns, it bends, it surprises. And in those turns, our need for others becomes undeniable.

Money, status, class, and race have long been used as measures of value, but they are unstable foundations for how we should treat others.

Artificial hierarchies are created that elevate some while diminishing others. And when we begin to believe we are “above” someone else because of these things, we step into dangerous territory. No amount of success can protect us from need.

No level of status can guarantee independence.

And no human being is self-sufficient enough to never require the help, wisdom, compassion, or access of another. “Superiority” is often an illusion sustained by a false sense of security and comfort, until discomfort exposes the truth.

This is not a warning but a simple invitation, an invitation to see people differently.

To recognize that every person carries value beyond what is immediately visible. Those roles shouldn’t define worth. That today’s “insignificant” connection may be tomorrow’s lifeline.

What if we treated people not based on who we think they are to us now, but with the awareness of who they could become in an unfolding story of our lives?

What if respect was not earned by status, but given because of shared humanity?

To live well in this world requires more than ambition or success, it requires humility.

It requires the understanding that we are all interconnected in ways we cannot fully predict. That no one is beneath dignity. That every interaction carries weight, whether it’s apparent in the moment or not. The way we treat people today is not just a reflection of our character, but perhaps an investment in a future we can’t yet see.

So here’s an invitation to speak kindly. Honor quietly. Pay attention to those others ignore because one day, you may find yourself standing at a place you never expected…grateful for someone you never thought you would ever need.

And in that moment, how you treat them will matter more than anything you once believed set you apart.  anablepsis

Integrity is the difference between what a person believes, what they say, and what they do especially when no one is watching.The word itself comes from the idea of wholeness. A person of integrity is not divided, but internally consistent. They are the same in private as in public. Their character is not situational. It’s not perfect, but consistent. It’s not ever failing, but refusing to live a lie.

I believe that integrity is profoundly important, without it trust collapses, relationships fracture, leadership becomes manipulative. Where there is no integrity, institutions decay, families weaken and society is left to cynicism. Integrity is the invisible infrastructure of civilization. When it erodes, everything else eventually follows.

Consider how much of life depends on trust: contracts, marriages, friendships, governments, churches, business transactions. If words mean nothing, nothing works, then what’s the point?

Let’s bring it home to a personal level. Integrity operates in layers: Personal integrity, in our personal life. Be willing to tell the truth about ourself, not just others. Be willing to acknowledge our weaknesses, it’s not like they don’t exist if you don’t. 

Refuse to deceive yourself, let’s be known for tying our actions with our convictions, this makes way for true inner peace.. A person without integrity lives in fragmentation, constantly managing optics…..”how does it look”?

So what does integrity really look like in interpersonal relationships? Let our yes mean yes, know why we said yes and stick with it. Keep our word even to our own hurt. When we speak, speak honestly but with care and regard for others and yourself. Be willing to admit when we’re wrong, don’t exploit trust. We will find this builds credibility.

People may not always like a person of integrity, but they sure do respect them.

How does integrity play out in leadership and influence? You may not consider yourself a leader but you are. I won’t try and convince you of it in this post, however leaders make decisions for the common good, not hidden gain. If power is ever given, it should be understood that it must be stewarded, not abused, transparency replaces manipulation.This builds legitimacy and boy, how important THAT is!

When leaders lack integrity, people become suspicious of authority itself.

People of integrity are generally healers of our society. Imagine a community where parents kept promises, pastors lived what they preached.

Think about business owners operating honestly without price gouging, public officials serving without exploitation. Imagine a world where neighbors told the truth, and teachers modeled consistency. What would happen? Trust would rise, fear would dissipate, cynicism would weaken, cooperation would increase.

Integrity reduces social anxiety when people trust each other, contracts would require less litigation, conflict resolves must faster. When integrity is present, collaboration grows, crime decreases, and emotional health improves. Integrity restores decency because it makes way for predictability, brings back trust and renews reliability.

So, if integrity is so good, why is it often lacking? Because integrity costs. It may cost one’s popularity, profit, promotion, power, immediate pleasure or gratification. Short-term gain often tempts people to violate long-term character, but integrity chooses long-term wholeness over short-term advantage.

Society does not change from the top down alone, it changes from the inside out. People must know what is right, not merely what is advantageous. Moral confusion produces compromised character. I don’t believe character is rewarded enough. I believe character should be rewarded, not just performance. If we only reward results, then people may cheat to win. I believe If we honor integrity, people may strive more to build character.

Integrity and accountability. This is something that may be a “turn off” for people. Who am I accountable to, and why should I be accountable? If you have a job you’re accountable to your employer, accountable to our families, community and foremost to ourselves.. Integrity grows where confession is safe, correction is allowed, pride is challenged, mentorship is present. Isolation erodes integrity.

When integrity is esteemed it strengthens families. Children learn not from lectures alone but primarily by practice. When a Dad apologizes, when a mother keeps her word, when discipline is consistent, when love is stable. Years ago, character began forming at the dinner table long before it’s even tested in the boardroom.

Integrity is about inner conviction. True integrity isn’t fear-based ie; “what if I get caught,” It’s identity-based “this is who I am.” When a person anchors their life in something higher than convenience, faith, moral law, conscience, then integrity becomes more reflexive than forced.

Integrity is how a better world is built. So here’s how it goes; strong individuals produce strong families, strong families produce strong communities and strong communities make for stable nations and integrity multiplies. 

One honest business owner affects hundreds. One faithful parent shapes generations. One courageous leader inspires thousands. Corruption is contagious, but so is integrity.

Integrity is not just about behavior, it’s about the condition of the heart. 

A person divided within, will eventually divide others but conversely a person made whole within can bring healing wherever they go. Remember, integrity isn’t loud. It doesn’t trend, it  doesn’t seek applause. But over time, it outlasts talent, charisma, and popularity.

anablepsis

The Pathway to Growth, Freedom, and Christlikeness
In a culture quick to assess, critique, and expose the faults of others, Scripture repeatedly calls believers to a different starting point, ourselves.

The Bible does not forbid discernment, nor does it promote moral blindness. What it does insist upon is order. Judgment that begins inwardly before it is ever directed outward.

The apostle Paul writes: “For if we would judge ourselves, we would not be judged.”
1 Corinthians 11:31. This verse alone reveals both the importance and the benefit of self-judgment. It is not punitive, but preventative. Not destructive, but redemptive.

Why is judging ourselves first, important? Biblical self-judgment is not about harsh self-criticism or self-loathing. It’s about honest spiritual assessment before God. When we refuse to examine ourselves, we often default to examining others, sometimes to distract ourselves from unresolved issues within. Jesus addressed this tendency directly: “And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank (or log) in your own eye?” Matthew 7:3,

The problem is not discernment….it’s direction. Outward evaluation without inward examination breeds hypocrisy, pride, and spiritual blindness. Introspection, on the other hand, cultivates humility, clarity, and repentance. Introspection vs. Outward Evaluation: Introspection is the willingness to stand before God and ask, “Lord, what is going on in me?” Outward evaluation often asks, “What is wrong with them?” David models godly introspection when he prays: “Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me, and know my anxieties; And see if there is any wicked way in me, And lead me in the way everlasting.” Psalm 139:23–24,

Notice: David invites God in to search him. This posture guards the heart from becoming defensive or self-deceived. Biblically healthy introspection helps lead to transformation, avoiding  spiritual paralysis.

Be careful! Self-evaluation, self-judgment, and self-condemnation are  not the same thing. It’s imperative in distinguishing between these three, because confusing them has caused unnecessary discouragement for many believers and even spiritual bondage for others.

1. Self-Evaluation: This is reflective and honest. It asks: What fruit is my life producing? Are my attitudes aligned with Christ?  “Examine yourselves as to whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves.” 2 Corinthians 13:5, Self-evaluation invites growth and maturity.

2. Self-Judgment: Biblical self-judgment is corrective, not condemning. It recognizes sin, confesses it, and turns from it “Let a man examine himself…” 1 Corinthians 11:28, This kind of judgment keeps us tender hearted, repentant, and aligned with God’s holiness.

3. Self-Condemnation

This is not from God. Period. Self-condemnation focuses on identity rather than behavior. It says: I am bad, not I did wrong. There is no hope, there is no grace. Scripture is clear: “There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus.” (Romans 8:1, NKJV) Self-condemnation paralyzes growth; self-judgment produces repentance and freedom.

The Role of Shame and Avoidance

Unresolved shame often causes people to avoid introspection altogether. Looking inward feels dangerous because it awakens pain, regret, or past failures. Instead of dealing with the heart, people may: Project faults onto others, become overly critical or defensive, distract themselves with activity or religiosity.

This divergence from self-examination is not healthy. Avoidance delays healing and keeps wounds unaddressed, yet scripture reminds us: “He who covers his sins will not prosper, But whoever confesses and forsakes them will have mercy.” (Proverbs 28:13, NKJV) God’s intention is never to expose without mercy. He invites us to come honestly so He can heal completely.

Is This Biblical? Absolutely. Biblical self-judgment is always tethered to: grace, truth, and restoration “For whom the Lord loves He chastens.” Hebrews 12:6, God’s correction is proof of relationship, not rejection.

The Fruit of Judging Ourselves First
When practiced rightly, self-examination produces visible fruit:

In Society: Humility instead of moral superiority Integrity instead of hypocrisy.

In Families: Greater patience and forgiveness, less blame-shifting, more accountability. 

In Our Walk With Christ:Deeper and more honest repentance. Greater sensitivity and responsiveness to the Holy Spirit. A life that increasingly reflects Christ. “But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed…”
(2 Corinthians 3:18, the mirror of God’s Word (the scriptures) was never meant to condemn us, but to transform us.

A Better Way Forward Judging ourselves first is not about living under scrutiny, it’s about living under grace-informed truth. It keeps our hearts soft, our repentance sincere, and our witness credible. When we begin with ourselves, we become better neighbors, better family members, and better followers of Jesus, not because we are perfect, because we are continually being refined. “Therefore let us pursue the things which make for peace and the things by which one may edify another.” Romans 14:19, and that pursuit always begins within. 

All passages taken from the NKJV

anablepsis.

There was a time, whether we remember it clearly or not, when we were “the new guy”.The new face in the room. The unfamiliar name. The one quietly scanning the environment, trying to figure out the rhythm, the language, the expectations.

Before we found our footing… before the introductions stopped feeling awkward… Before we knew where to sit, how things worked, or who was safe to ask, we were the outsider.

The funny thing is, once we cross that invisible line from new to known, from uncertain to competent, it’s easy to forget what that felt like.

We settle in, get comfortable and gain confidence through experience, skill, or accomplishment. And without realizing it, we stop noticing the ones standing where we once stood.

Not everyone struggles with being new. Some walk into unfamiliar spaces with ease, confident, adaptable, unbothered. But for many, being the “new guy” carries weight. It brings self-doubt, hesitation, and a quiet question underneath it all:

Do I belong here?

Sometimes the hardest part isn’t learning the role or mastering the task—it’s wondering if anyone sees you. That’s why small acts matter more than we think. A welcome instead of a nod, an explanation instead of an assumption. An invitation instead of silence.

These aren’t grand gestures. They’re human ones. And they can go a long way.

Being helpful and welcoming doesn’t require a title, authority, or a formal role. It simply requires memory….the willingness to remember what it felt like to arrive unsure, hoping someone would notice.

Whether it’s a new coworker, a new neighbor, a new volunteer, a new face in a faith community, or someone stepping into an unfamiliar season of life—there are opportunities everywhere to make space. Not because it’s required, not because it earns points, but because kindness has a way of restoring dignity.

Maybe the quiet challenge for us is this: Before asking, “Who’s the new guy?”
We pause and remember, “I was once him or them.”

And then we choose—wherever and whenever we can, to be the one who makes the room feel a little less foreign. Sometimes, that’s all it takes.

anablepsis

Let me say from the onset this is NOT a political post. I am taking a look into what the bible says about compassion in a nation and or society where compassion should come from a biblical perspective.

The Bible repeatedly warns nations that lose compassion for the poor, vulnerable, and powerless. This is not a peripheral issue; it is a covenantal litmus test of the heart.Take note of God’s charge against nations “Woe to those who decree unrighteous decrees… to rob the needy of justice, and to take what is right from the poor of My people.” (Isaiah 10:1–2, NKJV)

“The people of the land have used oppressions, committed robbery, and mistreated the poor and needy; and they wrongfully oppressed the stranger.” (Ezekiel 22:29)

When compassion erodes, God interprets it not as policy failure but moral rebellion. Nations are judged not only by what they believe, but by how they treat the least of these.(Matthew 25:40) 

“Righteousness exalts a nation, but sin is a reproach to any people.” (Proverbs 14:34)

In Scripture, a nation that hardens its heart toward the poor is already in spiritual decline, whether it recognizes it or not.

So who’s to blame? Government vs.Church? What are the distinct roles? What shared moral accountability does the government have?: Uphold justice, restrain evil, protect the vulnerable “He is God’s minister to you for good.” (Romans 13:4)

In the Old Testament, kings were judged harshly when they failed to defend the poor (Psalm 72; Jeremiah 22). God holds rulers accountable for systemic injustice, not personal charity.

The church should exist to: embody God’s compassion, the heart of God, model sacrificial love, meet needs relationally and spiritually.

“Pure and undefiled religion before God… is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble.” (James 1:27)

The church cannot outsource compassion to the state, nor can it wait for the government to “get it right.”

So is God expecting collaboration—or separation of responsibility?

The Bible never commands a formal partnership, but it does demand converging righteousness. Government/Justice, Church/Mercy, God/Both.

“He has shown you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God?” (Micah 6:8)

When justice and mercy separate, society fractures: Justice without mercy becomes cruel. Mercy without wisdom becomes chaotic.

God does not excuse either entity for neglecting its responsibility because the other failed.

4. The Abuse Argument: Can Misuse Justify Withholding Compassion?

Scripture acknowledges abuse—but never uses it as justification for hardened hearts.

“The poor you will always have with you.” (Matthew 26:11)

Jesus did not say this to excuse neglect, but to normalize persistent responsibility.

The Bible distinguishes between:

• Unwillingness to work (2 Thessalonians 3:10)
• Inability to escape hardship (Deuteronomy 15:7–11)

But notice:

“You shall not harden your heart nor shut your hand from your poor brother.” (Deut. 15:7)

God never permits withholding from everyone because of the failure of some. That is collective punishment, and God explicitly condemns it.

“Whoever shuts his ears to the cry of the poor will also cry himself and not be heard.” (Proverbs 21:13)

Where Do We Begin to Heal This Moral Cavity? It begins with the Church, not policy revival historically precedes reform. 

“If My people who are called by My name will humble themselves…” (2 Chronicles 7:14)

The church must do 3 things:

• Recover compassion without naivety
• Practice generosity with discernment
• Restore dignity, not dependency

It continues with righteous pressure on systems.

Biblical prophets spoke to kings, not just congregations.

“Open your mouth for the speechless… defend the poor and needy.” (Proverbs 31:8–9) Silence is not neutrality….it’s consent.

God’s ultimate concern, and what a loss of compassion reveals. It’s not merely social, it’s spiritual desensitization.

“Because lawlessness will abound, the love of many will grow cold.” (Matthew 24:12).

A society that grows indifferent to suffering has already lost something far more valuable than resources, it’s lost vision.

A Sobering Thought

In Matthew 25, nations are judged not by ideology, but by how they treat the poor. 

“Inasmuch as you did it to one of the least of these My brethren, you did it to Me.”

This is not addressed to governments alone—or churches alone—but to people.

Think about this…are we seeking solutions that preserve our comfort, or obedience that reflects God’s heart?

anablepsis

The Difference That Shapes Our Future

There’s a thin but distinct line between a mindset and set mind. Both sound similar, yet they operate in completely different ways. One opens doors, while the other often closes them. Understanding this difference can determine whether we grow or remain stuck, whether we evolve or merely exist, whether we step into new opportunities or keep circling the same old patterns.

A “mindset” is the framework that shapes growth. It’s the mental posture we carry toward life. It’s the lens through which we interpret experiences, challenges, and possibilities. Having a mindset doesn’t mean our mind is fixed, it means it’s set toward something.

For example, a growth mindset believes that ability can be developed through effort, learning, and perseverance. It stays open to feedback, embraces change, and sees failure not as a verdict, but as information.

A healthy mindset allows room for learning, adaptation, and new perspective. It can bend without breaking. It listens before it judges. It adjusts without losing conviction.

In short, a mindset is dynamic. It’s not a wall, but a bridge.

A “set mind” is the framework that limits vision. When one has a set mind, it’s rigid and it has already made its conclusions and is no longer open to growth or new input. It resists what challenges it and clings to what feels safe, familiar, or comfortable….yes, even if that familiarity is nonproductive.

A set mind can be anchored in pride, fear, or the need to be right. It doesn’t just have beliefs, it is bound by them. Instead of exploring possibilities, it seeks validation. Instead of asking “What can I learn?”, it insists, “I already know.”

While a mindset develops, a set mind hardens. It can’t see beyond its own position and therefore loses sight of progress.

The difference in practice: Growth vs.Stagnation can be as simple as When faced with a challenge: A mindset asks, “What can this teach me?” A set mind says, “This shouldn’t be happening to me.” When faced with correction: A mindset reflects and adjusts. A set mind resists and defends. When looking at others’ success: A mindset finds inspiration. A set mind feels threatened or envious And when considering change: A mindset steps out in faith. A set mind stays in fear.

This distinction brings clarity when we realize whether we’re operating with a mindset or a set mind, we start to understand our impediments more clearly.

Impediments often hide behind excuses like “that’s just the way I am,” or “nothing ever works out for me.” These are the words of a set mind, incarcerated by its own story. But the moment we shift to a mindset, we see what’s possible rather than what’s permanent. Obstacles become opportunities for strategy. Limitations become lessons in creativity.

Likewise, the same awareness gives sight to accomplishments. We begin to recognize how much progress we’ve actually made, not because everything has gone perfectly, but because we’ve grown through what we faced. Growth becomes measurable not in comfort, but in character. How am I improving in my mental and moral qualities?

So, which would be more beneficial in the year ahead? For me, without question, a mindset, particularly one anchored in hope, humility, and resilience. A new year of change and even response to it, demands openness to fresh ways of thinking. We can’t step into a “windshield future”, looking into an “old rigid rearview mirror”, (I’ve tried it and failed miserably) Besides that, the windshield is bigger than the rear view mirror for a reason! LOL.

As we consider making changes in our lives and aim for a better year ahead, the invitation is simple: I encourage you, don’t have a set mind that insists, but rather embrace a mindset that invests. The first locks us into the past, the second may very well launch us into a more preferable future.

If last year taught us what to survive, let this year teach us how to thrive, despite circumstances. Let’s keep our mind set toward growth, but never set against change, because a mindset moves mountains, while set minds build walls, and walls may build a maze of more confusion….ah, no thanks.

anablepsis

I’ve been thinking about Christmas. It isn’t the same for everyone, so I was inspired to title this post: “Rediscovering the True Meaning of Christmas Beyond the Glitter”

For some, Christmas glows with laughter, lights, and gift wrap. For others, it’s a quiet ache, a reminder of loss, loneliness, or financial pressure that wasn’t there as recently as last year.

The truth is, Christmas isn’t the same for everyone, and perhaps that realization can bring us closer to what this sacred season was originally intended to be.

The true meaning of Christmas at its heart, commemorates the birth of Jesus Christ, the greatest expression of divine love and humility.

“For there is born to you this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord.” Luke 2:11 NKJV

It is the story of God drawing near; a baby in a manger, peace proclaimed to humble shepherds, hope dawning into a dark world. Christmas was never meant to be about excess, but about incarnation or (God coming in the form of Man) compassion, and generosity of spirit.

Early Christians and later generations celebrated by gathering for worship, sharing meals, and extending charity to the poor. The focus was (spiritual); God with us (and relational), God among us.

The problem comes in when the lights of celebration outshine the original message. Over time, commercialism subtly began to take center stage. What began as a holy day has gradually become a retail season. Storefronts glitter weeks before Thanksgiving, and advertising tells us that Christmas “arrives” when the shopping does. We moved from Merry Christmas to “Merry X-mas” where Christ was X’d out and (merchandising and sales) moved in!

A 2024 Rasmussen Reports survey found that 65% of Americans believe Christmas is “too commercialized.” Many feel pressured to buy, spend, and decorate to keep up with expectations often going into debt to do so.

We see homes “gilded” with lights and inflatable Santas, reindeers and elves, many quietly wonder how they’ll afford gifts or even make rent. The spiritual wonder of Christ’s birth is easily dimmed, worse yet, overshadowed by the lure of consumerism.

Commercial Christmas now sells an image: the more gifts under the biggest tree the happier the family. Yet Scripture reminds us that true joy is not found under the tree but in the One who hung upon a tree for our salvation. I’m not being a “Debby Downer” here, but keeping the main thing the main thing.

A Changing Spirit: Simpler, Kinder, More Aware

The good news? Attitudes are shifting. Many people are pushing back against the pressure and returning to a simpler, more heartfelt way to celebrate.

• Scaling back: Minimalist and “quiet Christmas” movements encourage smaller gatherings, less décor, and more rest and reflection.
• Giving presence, over presents: Families are focusing on time together, acts of service, and relational connection beyond material gifts.
• Hospitality and inclusion: Some intentionally invite those who are grieving, elderly, or alone to join their celebrations.
• Charitable focus: Nearly 62% of Americans plan to give to charity during the holiday season.
• Economic reality: According to a 2025 holiday outlook, 84% of consumers expect to cut back spending — signaling not just tighter budgets, but a conscious choice to simplify.

Even among younger generations, there’s a quiet revolution — a desire to reclaim authenticity and meaning. Instead of chasing the “perfect Christmas,” they’re seeking a purposeful and meaningful one.

Remembering Those Who See Christmas Differently

Christmas can be a painful time for many — those who have lost loved ones, live far from family, or face economic hardship. The call of Christ’s birth is to see them, include them, and love them.

Invite someone new to your table. Make a phone call to a person who may be spending the season alone. Send a note of encouragement instead of a store-bought gift. These simple gestures reflect the original Christmas spirit — God coming near to the overlooked and forgotten.

Bringing It Back Home

This year, before we decorate or buy, let’s pause and ask:

• Who around me needs hope this season?
• How can I reflect the humility of Christ more than the noise of culture?
• What traditions can I simplify to make more room for meaning?

The true miracle of Christmas is not found in packages, but in presence — God’s presence with us, and our presence with one another.

“Behold, the virgin shall be with child, and bear a Son, and they shall call His name Immanuel,” which is translated, “God with us.” — Matthew 1:23 NKJV 

May this Christmas draw us back to the heart of it all: Peace on earth, goodwill toward men.

anablepsis.