Live Deliberately

Untitled design (21)I was told by a friend the other day that a mutual friend passed away. I was shocked because I was lookin for this friend over the past couple years and could never get a response.

One of life’s cyclical songs to me is by James Taylor called Fire and Rain which states ‘I’ve seen Fire and I’ve seen Rain, I’ve seen sunny days that I thought would never end, I’ve seen lonely times when I could not find a friend, but I always thought that I’d see you again.’

Some how for me this song was a reminder of certain episodes in my life in the refrain; “ I always thought that I’d see you again.”

It’s a belief that a last experience and encounter with a person or group would be would be reserved like a bookmark in a book until the next time.

I was reminded starkly the other day, that our last time meeting may be our last time.

I’m not being morbid here, but it might serve as a conscious reminder as to how we leave each other after spending time together.

Let the final experiences memorialize fond memories, securing thoughts and acts of your kindness, care, friendship and love to those we may or may never see again.

As life continues to remind us that, there are no guarantees, let’s act deliberately with consciously favorable intent.

Well, so long my friend, I pray I served you well.

anablepsis.

Happy Birthday

KelvinBrendaTomorrow  (May 17, 2020) I will be celebrating my 60th Birthday, that’s NOT the purpose of this post, but a result of my thoughts reflecting over my past 59 years of life.

Unequivocally, God has been good to me. I make no mistake about this. I am unashamed about this, I make no excuses about this, because I’m grateful for it.

I’m a man having both parents still living married together 61 years, my Dad 91 years my Mom 80 years. Both are still independent, neither in a nursing home, I can speak with them by phone (in another state) and I do, 3 times a week or more. My sister cares for our parents in an exceptional way.

I’m glad to be living and glad to be GIVING while living even in a time like this.

When my life began 60 years ago, only God knew how it would turn out. I’ve come to understand that we are “backing into” our future which is why the future is a mystery.

One thing I’ve learned, and continue to learn about life is that it is a mixture of good and bad, highs and lows, a gentleman told me; ‘you don’t have problems Kelvin, only challenges and opportunities.’

Those “challenges and opportunities” over time turned my hair gray, some nights put “bags” under my eyes, body aches and pains became more pronounced, resilience takes a little more time. But I wouldn’t change a thing.

Time does it to us all I guess. None of us pass off the scene as young looking as we arrived.

I’ve found that time is the most precious commodity we have.

There was an older gentleman I knew, who built his house in the Hollywood Hills several years ago under the Hollywood sign out here in L.A.(you could look up and see some of the letters from the sign from his back yard.) He told me, “don’t let the clock run out on you young man.”

MacHollywoodAnablepsis

I took it to mean, don’t die before finishing your mission. He’s gone on, but his words still haunt me today.

With the time remaining a mystery, I now face this next episode with a vision of entering it with wisdom.

Reevaluating more. Living more deliberate than before. Improving in areas of my life where needed. Treasuring the magnificent relationships I have. Embracing humility and self sacrifice even more than before. Executing balance. Passing on my experiences to the next generation, and enjoy watching them reach their goals and dreams.

Listen, I don’t plan on leaving anytime soon, I still have some measure of “senior vitality” but these days I wanna pass it on, pay it forward. Enjoying this next season of life.

Finally, my Brenda. You know, it gets harder for me to talk about our relationship without tearing up, the older I get.

I call tears “liquid words.”

Brenda Chambliss, my wife of 22 years has been such an incredible life partner, not because of what she does for me, but because of who she is and how she lives her life.

She loves the Lord, and loves me too, and proves both repeatedly.

She’s a great example to me of faith and not giving up. I’ve seen her sacrifices for our family, I’ve witnessed Brenda do very hard things, embracing challenges, figuring it out.

She inspires me, she encourages me to wanna live, she compels me to be better.

Winning her love has been the only dreamed that mattered that came true in my life. It’s a joy to live worthy of it each day.

I encourage you today, birthday or not, begin today, living with deliberate intent.

My uncle told me something many many years ago about life that’s 50 % true, and 50% alarming.

He said; “we are old too soon and learn too late”.

Please don’t let the latter be the case.

anablepsis.

Revisit Review Amend

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This is NOT a political story. This is NOT a racially motivated post.
I believe there are laws in some states of our country that are being misappropriated that I believe need to be revisited, reviewed and amended.
Ahmaud Arbery may not be a name you are familiar with. I wasn’t either til this past week.
On February 23,2020, Ahmaud Arbery an unarmed 25 year old African American man was jogging along a road in Satilla Shores, a community in unincorporated Glynn County, when he was confronted by two armed caucasian men (father and son) in a pickup truck; the confrontation ended with Arbery being shot dead.
Georgia’s Citizen’s Arrest Law:
Allows citizens to arrest anyone that they’ve witnessed committing a crime in their presence or has immediate knowledge of the crime, although attorneys around the state of Georgia say that wasn’t the case in Ahmaud Arbery’s death.
The problem I have here is not that the men didn’t have the right to make a citizens arrest according to the laws of the state, but they broke the law.
And that day to my knowledge neither men were picked up or questioned about the incident.
In this case the law simply wasn’t followed which states citizens are allowed; “to arrest anyone that they’ve WITNESSED committing a crime IN THEIR PRESENCE or has IMMEDIATE knowledge of the crime”.
Mr Arbery was jogging unarmed pursued and killed. This incident happened in February earlier this year however, only after public outcry as a result of a video of the incident, the two men were finally apprehended a few days ago.
In following this story the man who killed this 25 year old young man said he believed the young runner, resembled someone he thought committed a crime.
I read where this young man wasn’t an angel. It was stated Mr Arbery bought a gun to a High School basketball game and was indicted when he was 19 years old. He also was said to have been caught shoplifting.
I don’t know when or even if it any of this was true.
On that fateful day in February, Mr Arbery was doing neither. He wasn’t killed for shoplifting, he wasn’t killed because he was armed and threatening. He was killed for another reason.
It was said the young man was seen earlier going through a construction site of a home that was being built or renovated. The owner of the home said no crime was committed.
The attorneys for the prosecution are seeking for this case to classified as a hate crime.
I know that there will be attorneys for the defense that will paint these men to be good citizens and they were just protecting the community and got it wrong about this young man. Maybe they were good citizens, maybe they believed they were protecting the community.
What happened to picking up the mobile phone instead of a gun? Why weren’t the police called, they are trained to make arrest.
But a “citizen’s arrest” wasn’t what this father and son team had in mind. They were on the prowl, no need to call police for this situation, because the objective was clear… provoke, and kill, not provoke and arrest.
This young man couldn’t have outrun a truck, this young man couldn’t have outrun a bullet.
Ahmaud Arbery died in cold blood.
His only crime that day was running down a street and coming within the sight lines of two men posing as community protectors, ready to administer law according to their own twisted minds.
As I said in my preamble to this post: “I believe there are laws in some states of our country that are being misappropriated that I believe need to be revisited, reviewed and amended.”
Now would be a great time to look at the laws in unincorporated Glynn County, that would be a great place to begin.
anablepsis.

 

Mothers

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I’m grateful my Mother is still with my siblings and I today. You may be celebrating memories of your Mom, or like me blessed to still have her here to call and say; ‘I love and appreciate you’.
The first Mother’s Day was May 9th 1914 where President Woodrow Wilson said; “Think of all the work that mothers do in raising their children. Mothers need to be celebrated!” He asked Americans on that day to give a public “thank you” to their mothers and all mothers.
Well Mr. Wilson, a lot has changed since your proclamation back in May 1914. While we still celebrate Mother’s Day on the 2nd Sunday of May, circumstances are different these days for various families.
As I stand in gratitude for a great Mother in my life, I realize this isn’t the case for every family.
Times have changed, the architecture of family has changed. All Mothers aren’t “raising children” as they use to because some have taken on a different function in the home. Today, Mothers are breadwinners, ceos, career women, single parents, their role and responsibilities in their home has changed. Today, some Fathers are home raising children, nannys are, Grandmothers are, some institutions are.
Not everyone looks fondly on the thought of Mother. In some cases it’s a painful memory not because of loss, but because of what was not experienced. For whatever reason, the relationship wasn’t a nurturing one but an existence filled with aggression, anger, resentment, hostility.
There are Mothers today, alive, but separated from their families as a result of prison.
Some Mothers who never met their children because they died giving birth. Mothers with addictions, Mothers with mental health issues. Mothers who forsook their responsibility for others to pick up.
Others were snatched away by heart attacks or other medical issues, car accidents, some died in weather storms, by murder, natural causes. There were Mothers who left slowly and painfully, others who left reluctantly because they were called home.
Today, there is heartache in some cases we respect that. Another perspective is a meaningless day because of your memories, we accept that. Others, are thankful for another year with their Mother, we are grateful for that.
In any case, whatever your memory or impediment over Mother. One day, a woman gave birth to you, and risked her life to deliver you here.
So in EVERY case, because YOUR’E HERE, we honor her deed.
anablepsis.

What Makes a Person Turn Their Back on God?

Untitled design (38)If I were to ask several people their thoughts on God, there would no doubt be various opinions, ideas and comments.

While this can be a sticky subject for some, I can share my experience as it relates to the need I had then and still do for God.
My reason for asking the Lord into my life, had more to do with me walking around as a living man outwardly but a dying man inwardly.
An internal emptiness that no earthly panacea could fill.
While this of course isn’t everyone’s case, mine came through my religious experience. I found that what I did religiously translated different practically. This means religion and church was what I did, but what I lived was who I really was.
Today we would call this a hypocrite. I don’t say that putting myself down. I thought I was a good person comparatively speaking, however that was not enough.
I would feel good about what I did religiously but once the religious practice concluded, the more “relaxed version” of myself picked up. The projection vs the actual.
I came into a different understanding between 2004 and 2005. It was when I saw the effectiveness of my service being connected to the purity of my life.
This meant that my motives were more important than “the
good” I’d done.
The reason behind the actions became the priority of my focus. Was it purely for their need or my notoriety? I had to check my intentions for that.
I went through a season of untidiness. Tidiness is key. Order, arrangement, alignment in ones life is essential.
In that season of untidiness I had to learn to “cross my t’s” and “dot my i’s. ”Learn the importance of living by principle, not governed by emotions. That life needed personal government, internal management, personal responsibility and accountability in order to work successfully.
While these things continue to be a work in progress, to have the awareness of what’s needed and the committed heart to see to it being done.
While this may seem like a lot, it really isn’t. When you believe there is a better, more complete version of yourself you’re eager to participate in the process.
God really IS good, whether you know Him or not. God is good whether you believe in Him or not. God is good whether you understand Him or not. God is good whether you are a follower or not. God is good whether you have a good past or bad past.
With a God that good it makes me wonder…
What makes anyone turn their back on a God so good?
anablepsis

What’s Ahead?

Untitled design (23)Have you come to terms with the new normal yet? I believe I’m like those of you that are still adjusting. Obviously we don’t know all of the details that the new normal entails, but I want to make sure that my “inner” stays healthy, (heart mind and attitude).
While it is said that nothing is more permanent than change, sometimes we reach a place when we feel; “enough already” as it relates to boredom and redundancy in being locked down.
The human will, is being tested along with the bandwidth of the human mind… sometimes simultaneously.
Being “creatures of habit” play into this as well, sometimes the frustration of laws meant to protect us gets too confining, some feel with these things they’re being pushed too far.
For example; I saw a video of women with their children at the playground. An officer came up and politely told the ladies the park was closed. He was calm, nice and respectful, someone was obviously videoing the scene. He explained why the park was closed.
One mother captured my attention who appeared to be more vocal than the others, more questioning against officer. The camera picked up the woman as she began to go back and forth verbally with the officer. The entire video was about 40 min in length but exchanges were made prior to the recording (the article explained) this particular mother was insistent on going back and forth with the officer. She was displeased with the park being closed.
I realize the aggravation people are feeling as a result of being inside. There is a yearning to return to “normalcy” as we’ve known it.
After several minutes of exchange, the woman voluntarily placed her hands behind her back and the officer handcuffed the her and took her away. An unseen female was heard the video saying; “her children are here”! That saddened me.
A day intended to visit the playground park with her children, is now being arrested by police separated from them away from the park she came to visit, because of a disappointment gone haywire.
Why did the mother take it that far to the point of being arrested?
These are perplexing days. Some people are tired and frustrated, taking this new normal hard because their “inner”is being tested severely.
Perhaps these actions are a cry for intervention…who knows maybe a Divine intervention.
anablepsis.

Meet My Friend James

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There is a young man I’ve known almost 11 yrs now. I have deep respect for James, his family and their privacy. He will be known as “James” (my middle name) for this article.
In 2009 I met James and his family. He was born with Down Syndrome (D.S.) My best estimate is that James is now a teenager.
It’s been a long time since seeing him and his family and I recently reconnected with his parents. I was able to see pictures of him they publicized from time to time. I was excitingly amazed at how he’d grown up.
When I would see recent photos or videos of James I noticed qualities in him, I would see that struck me. This post isn’t about the briefing I’ve done on D. S. nor my disappointment for anemic funding for research to help in the fight to minimize the syndrome.
This post isn’t about James having D.S. but what exudes from him despite it, and the indirect impact it’s had on me through glimpses of him interacting in his world.
While studies ascribe behavior and delayed intellect and development in those living with D. S. what I see in James could easily be missed by the “intelligence” of our day.
From what I can see, James is teachable. He doesn’t appear moody. He seems to be able to work with others, and doesn’t need to lead. He celebrates passionately because of accomplishment, not ego. He’s humble enough to be camera shy. He doesn’t appear to have many concerns or worries(as I have at times.)
James radiates to me what internal purity should reveal. I don’t see malice coming through his eyes, I do see willingness, compliance, humility, those attributes that can allude adults if we’re not careful.
When I look at James I don’t see someone who would to try to “hustle me” or sell me a “bill of goods” just for his bottom line.
What’s refreshing to see in this world is the expression of wonderment in a world of skepticism and trepidation.
No wonder Jesus said If you wanna see the kingdom you must be as a child.
Maybe that’s what I see in James.
I don’t live with James, and I don’t know if my impressions are accurate, but that’s the sense I get when I see his face.
Whether a smiling thumbs up, a still photo in the middle of a project. Whether running doing a sprint to doing his school work or engaging one of his favorite computer games. He’s not “stressin”.
Makes me ask myself, if James’ has “down” what’s “up” with me?
anablepsis.

John Chapter 9

Divine Stimulus In the Bible, John Chapter 9 is recorded a story of a man who was born blind.

His name wasn’t give, his family financial status wasn’t mentioned, but his affliction was; born blind. We are all blind to something whether it is particulars about tomorrow, or the end of COVID-19 Coronavirus.

In this case the disciples asked Jesus why he was born that way, was it his sin or his parents sin?

Jesus said neither, just so God’s work would be seen through his life. Sometimes in the mind; there has to be a logical connection as to why things are the way they are. It somehow satisfies the curiosity to attached a bad result to bad behavior, but in this case it was different. This man was born blind for this defining moment in Jesus’ ministry.

The thing that amazes me about this story was how the religious leaders of that day chose to discredit the miracle of Jesus. I would think such a miracle of recovery of of sight would garner praise not criticism of Jesus. Herein lies my disappointment with the religious leaders of that day.

Those religious pundits had time to heal this man, and all while he was blind never seemed moved to do it. Frankly, I doubt if they possessed the power to do so, had they, I can’t find a reason for them not to have bought their ability to public notoriety.

As the Bible story has it John Chapter 9. There is a series of questions the man is asked about how he regained his sight. No matter what answer was given it never satisfied the critics. They went to his parents to see if he was actually born blind and if they knew who healed him.

One of the many messages in this story for me is how new found sight can be a problem publicly as your blindness was personally…the good news in verse 36 is when you’re thrown out of the temple, is when Jesus looks for you because in certain places, He was too…who better to relate?

anablepsis

Gratitude

Kelvin ChamblissGratitude is defined as the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.

At times things we are accustomed to that are beneficial to us, if we’re not careful can go unacknowledged, and it’s not always because it’s taken for granted. Gratitude should be deliberate, and born out of a realization.
It can be simple for gratitude to allude us as, vital, stable, consistent things we depend on carry us almost without thought.
An example of this is seen in the ability to dress ourselves. It’s not until a necessary part of our body hurts as we dress or becomes
incapacitated and incapable of functioning as normal, that it’s importance magnified.
I invite you to join me in naming on your own just a few things you are gratefully aware of today. And these may sometimes include bitter circumstances and hard places…they count also, as they make and develop us in essential ways.
anablepsis

Alarm to Wake Up or Snooze?

SnoozeI read an article the other day of a man around my age who was critical of COVID-19 Coronavirus. He posted on Social Media that the virus was (oh well, my word here…bull manure) and a Political ploy. He died a few days ago from the virus. What was real, what he believed wasn’t true but was, or what he wished wasn’t true, into not being true?

Brenda and I were talking about this and to our never ending amazement for people to ignore, criticize, politicize, this pandemic as though nothing significant has occurred.

I read where one televangelist believed that he could blow Coronavirus away! Well, he tried, and it’s still here.

Democrats and Republicans deeply divided over who will get the political edge over this pandemic to hurl at the other side.

What keeps a country so divided? What has people so skeptical about padded numbers of the growing list of loss of life, people with names, having left families, jobs, friends, memories and some folks dying in just a matter of days.

My Dad had a friend, that spoke to him one Tuesday by phone, two days later he died COVID-19 took him away.

What is it going to take? There seems to be a willful blindness by some, and hyperbole by others.

One of the most puzzling things ever invented on an alarm clock (in my opinion) was a snooze button. If you’re a person that thanks God for it, what can I say?

I thought an alarm clock was to wake us up or alert us and call us into action, but with the snooze feature we can condition ourselves to not to take the alarm seriously and defer response times to it.

When the alarm is not being used in this case for action but deferred response, we can say to ourselves (‘I have more time’, or ‘that’s only the first alarm, another will follow shortly.’)

The world has changed, however in this case I believe God has sounded the alarm.

The question today is , what is the correct response to His alarm seeing that God’s alarm has no snooze feature?

Can we hear it? Do we hear it but drown it out?

How many more warnings do we get?

anablepsis.